The only thing I can think about is studies. I only realise the importance of education when I am approaching the very important exams in my life. This is so sad. Well.. Better than nothing.

Tomorrow we are having a soccer match against 13/03. It had been a long time since I felt the excitement of something happening in my life other than that of betting. The feeling is different when playing within the class. I know everyone and it's just not nice to get tough or go all out in the spirit of a competition. I am looking forward to the match. My legs are getting fat.

I wonder what would I be like if my parents had developed another side of me. The artistic or sporty side. I was once a swimmer when I was around 5 years old. But because my mother thought I was too weak to be in the cold water for too long, she pulled me out of the class. I still have a vague memory of those days. I remember playing with my favourite swimming board. I would always aim to be first when swimming the laps with the board. And if I remember correctly, I usually did. I also remember swimming in the deep end with my heart thumping twice the normal rate. If I had continued with swimming, I could be some top sportsman now!

I regret not continuing with swimming as well as not taking up an instrument like piano or saxophone. Occasionally, I will daydream about performing solo in front of a large crowd in a romantic ambience with a saxophone. It's like a dream which I can never reach now. Too bad my parents weren't those 'kiasu' type who want me to excel in all areas. I certainly love that no matter the hard work. At least I would have some other leisure activities now. It will also boost my self-esteem, not that it is very low now.

In future, I will send my children to extra classes. Of course, not to force them, but to really find out what they like. I hate to see them having regrets in life like me.. Or should I say childhood. My life isn't over yet, I could still fufill my dream, perhaps in old age.

There is one thing though, that they could never experience like I did when I was child. That is to sail around the globe on board a car-carrier for 2 years. that is what I did with my parents. That is the happiest times in my life and I believe, it will always be. I hope and pray that I will still be able to retain part of the memory when I grow old. It was a really carefree and enjoyable time being the "star" of the ship. WhereverI went, I would see people beaming down on me. The crew were fighting to play with me, feed me and carry me. I still remember those times. *sigh* Too bad they aren't any videos to watch to show off to my friends. *grin*